Let’s be honest, teaching self-control is probably not the most exciting aspect of teaching. You’re likely not excited to create lesson plans around quiet body, inside voices, and hands to yourself. 

Yet, if you’re a special education teacher, especially in an elementary classroom, you’ll absolutely find yourself there. So, we’re going to make it easier for you to teach key elements of self control using children’s books that work perfectly in your classroom. 

When we teach self-control, we’re trying to teach kids how to pause and think before acting. We’re teaching them to make good choices, giving them self-control strategies, showing them different perspectives, and teaching them life lessons that they’ll use into adulthood.

Self-regulation skills are those kinds of things we often take for granted and think we don’t necessarily need to spend learning time on teaching them in our classrooms, but teaching emotional regulation skills, personal space, and how to handle strong feelings, for example, are never a bad idea.

Teaching these skills helps students with peer relationships, navigating their different emotions, and making positive choices. In this blog post, I’m going to list off some good books you can use today in your classroom without a ton of extra prep! First let’s talk about why books are the MVP of teaching self-control.

Why Books Work So Well for Teaching Self-Control

You can stand at the front of the room and say “make good choices” all day long, but when a book character doesn’t, and your students giggle or whisper “uh-oh,” that’s when you actually get their attention.

And that’s why teaching with books is so impactful. It puts kids inside the mind of characters that look and sound just like them. Books show your students situations they’ll actually face, without putting them on the spot. They get to witness big feelings, impulsive choices, and the natural consequences without being in the spotlight. 

Plus, books are a good example of empathy and are beautiful ways to build this important skill. Characters that let students step into someone else’s shoes, and see that choices impact others, are great strategies for teaching self-control. 

We get a win for social-emotional learning without adding more paperwork and lesson planning to our dockets.

Books are also the perfect way to teach diverse learners. Visual thinkers, ELLs, neurodivergent students all benefit from an interactive book. These books give them multiple entry points to learning through the illustrations, dialogue, and repetition that you often find in books with these themes.

If you’re aiming to open up real, honest conversations about self-control, and want a big return on the little time investment, books are it! 

Books That Teach Self-Control

These books are all linked and contain affiliate links. That means I get a small kick back, but all of these books I love and suggest for your classroom!

Books About Managing Impulses & Thinking Before Acting

1. What If Everybody Did That? – Ellen Javernick
   Shows how small actions add up and why impulse control matters.
2. My Mouth is a Volcano! – Julia Cook
   A classic for students who blurt out or interrupt.
3. Interrupting Chicken – David Ezra Stein
   A silly story that opens up discussions about waiting and listening.
4. Decibella and Her 6-Inch Voice – Julia Cook
   Great for kids working on volume control in social settings.
5. But It’s Not My Fault! – Julia Cook
   Helps kids take responsibility rather than blaming others impulsively.
6. I Just Don’t Like the Sound of No! – Julia Cook
   Tackles accepting “no” and handling disappointment.
7. Don’t Squeal Unless It’s a Big Deal – Jeanie Franz Ransom
   Encourages students to pause and assess before reacting.
8. Clark the Shark – Bruce Hale
   A lovable shark who learns when to tone it down.
9. Oops! – Hyewon Yum
   A toddler-style book great for early elementary that teaches cause and effect of impulsive actions.
10. Lilly’s Purple Plastic Purse – Kevin Henkes
    A good reminder about patience and respecting class rules.

Books on Emotional Regulation & Calming Strategies

11. When Sophie Gets Angry—Really, Really Angry… – Molly Bang
    Powerful visual metaphor for calming down after big emotions.
12. The Color Monster – Anna Llenas
    Helps students identify and sort their feelings.
13. Cool Down and Work Through Anger – Cheri J. Meiners
    Direct and strategy-based—ideal for classroom modeling.
14. Anh’s Anger – Gail Silver
    A mindful story about accepting and sitting with anger.
15. The Way I Feel – Janan Cain
    Vivid illustrations paired with feeling vocabulary.
16. How Do Dinosaurs Say I’m Mad? – Jane Yolen
    A lighthearted way to talk about emotional outbursts.
17. Moody Cow Meditates – Kerry Lee MacLean
    Introduces mindfulness and breathing to handle stress.
18. B is for Breathe – Melissa Munro Boyd
    Great for younger students—teaches self-care and calm-down tips.
19. Breathing Makes It Better – Christopher Willard & Wendy O’Leary
    Simple breathing strategies embedded into a story.
20. Little Monkey Calms Down – Michael Dahl
    Board-book format that’s perfect for PreK–1 regulation work.

Books That Reinforce Waiting, Patience, and Delayed Gratification

21. Waiting is Not Easy! – Mo Willems
    Elephant and Piggie teach why good things come to those who wait.
22. The Most Magnificent Thing – Ashley Spires
    Shows perseverance and what to do when things don’t work right away.
23. Llama Llama Mad at Mama – Anna Dewdney
    Connects with kids who struggle with waiting or transitions.
24. I Can Wait – Rachel Robertson
    Encourages kids to self-regulate and manage waiting time.
25. David Goes to School – David Shannon
    A humorous look at impulsive behavior and learning self-control.
26. Millie Fierce – Jane Manning
    Addresses what happens when frustration boils over and how to regroup.
27. Sam and the Construction Site – Tori Kosara
    Helps kids understand step-by-step progress and patience.
28. Be Calm on Ahway Island – Carmen Goetz
    Based on a calming podcast, this teaches wind-down routines.
29. The Koala Who Could – Rachel Bright
    Talks about facing new things and resisting avoidance behaviors.
30. Waiting – Kevin Henkes
    A quiet, gentle story to support patience and attention-building.

Books that Model Social Thinking & Executive Function

31. Howard B. Wigglebottom Learns to Listen – Howard Binkow
    A go-to for redirecting off-task or inattentive behaviors.
32. The Bad Seed – Jory John
    Great metaphor for change and making better choices.
33. The Good Egg – Jory John
    Reinforces self-care and balance, especially for perfectionist kids.
34. The Recess Queen – Alexis O’Neill
    Tackles aggression and self-regulation in social settings.
35. Tucker Turtle Takes Time to Tuck and Think – NCPMI
    A beloved social-emotional story often used in self-regulation plans.
36. Leo the Late Bloomer – Robert Kraus
    Encourages self-paced development without impulsivity.
37. Fergus and Zeke – Kate Messner
    Promotes flexibility and problem-solving.
38. Even Superheroes Have Bad Days – Shelly Becker
    Shows kids that even superheroes need to regulate emotions.
39. The Invisible Boy – Trudy Ludwig
    Reinforces social inclusion and thinking about others’ feelings.
40. A Little Spot of Emotion Box Set – Diane Alber
    Tons of visuals and SEL content—ideal for behavior support work.

Books That Support Behavior Goals in SEL & Intervention Plans

41. Giraffes Can’t Dance – Giles Andreae
    Promotes confidence and managing discouragement.
42. Ruby Finds a Worry – Tom Percival
    Introduces anxiety management through accessible language.
43. I Am Peace – Susan Verde
    Helps kids connect to breath and stillness.
44. I Am Yoga – Susan Verde
    Encourages movement and mindfulness.
45. Listening to My Body – Gabi Garcia
    Teaches interoception and emotional awareness.
46. I Choose to Calm My Anger – Elizabeth Estrada
    Straightforward social story style for anger regulation.
47. The Rabbit Listened – Cori Doerrfeld
    Models supportive listening and emotional presence.
48. No Fits, Nilson! – Zachariah OHora
    A hilarious but real take on tantrum management.
49. Harriet, You’ll Drive Me Wild! – Mem Fox
    A gentle book about losing patience—and apologizing afterward.
50. Hands Are Not for Hitting – Martine Agassi
    A classic for early childhood classrooms that teaches safe hands.

Best Practices for Using Books to Teach Self-Control

Let’s be real, you can have the perfect book in your hands, but if you’re just reading it to check a box and say you did it, it’s not going to work. Your students aren’t going to internalize the message without a little more action and intention around it. 

To actually make these stories work, you’ll have to be intentional. Luckily, that doesn’t mean complicated. There are lots of ways to support students with these books that don’t require tons of time. 

Start by previewing the vocabulary or any sticky concepts ahead of time. If the book talks about “self-regulation” or “impulse control,” translate that into your students’ language first: waiting your turn, calming your body, taking a deep breath. You want to make sure your students understand exactly what self-control is and how self-control works.

As you read, don’t be afraid to pause and connect the story to what actually happens in your classroom. “Has anyone ever felt like Sophie when she got really, REALLY angry?” Bring it back to yourself too! Make sure your students know how you exhibit self-control and how you navigate these important skills in your own life.

After the story, keep the conversation going. Use simple reflection questions like:

-What did the character do really well?
-What could they have done instead?
-Has that ever happened to you?

Don’t forget about visuals too! Anchor charts, feeling faces, calm-down strategies are the bridge to help you take these self-regulation strategies from story to real life.

And whatever you do, don’t just read a book once and shelve it. Kids need repetition. Lots of it. Pull it out again during morning meeting…after a tough recess…or before a sub day. The more they hear it, the more it sinks in. And the more that adorable little girl in your class who has a hard time blurting every answer out starts to learn to raise her hand, at least most of the time. 

Why Self-Control Books Are a Game-Changer

Look, teaching self-control isn’t flashy. But it is the thing that makes your classroom run smoother, your students feel safer, and your behavior charts a little less…colorful.

Books give you a powerful way to model real-life situations without turning it into a lecture or behavior report. They build real connections with your students, offer a mirror for their emotions, and limit shaming by saying, “Hey, other kids feel this way too and this what they do instead.”

Keep these books in your back pocket for when emotions are high or attention is really low. You’ll be surprised how much ground a simple story can cover especially when the lesson is about self-control.